lyracamacho

Okay, so today is my starting date!  My beginning weight this time around is 196 lbs, but I’m hoping to lose some of it quickly considering I did just have a baby two weeks ago today.  I don’t know what my plan is, and I don’t even know how to reset the weigh loss ticker because I’m so far from that starting weight and I’d like to just start all over!

I took a temporary leave from Buddy Slim and dieting/exercising after my father passed.  There was too much going on, and I had put on several pounds from living off of fast food and hospital food.  I was discouraged, looking for housing, trying to care for my three children singlehandedly, and handle my father’s final affairs.

I moved into an apartment, and within a week or so, ended up in severe pain.  It turned out to be a herniated disc.  I couldn’t even walk without being in tears.  It was next to impossible to even lift my leg high enough to step into the shower.  I was hurting like I had never hurt before, which finally led me to see a doctor.  The medication didn’t do anything except help me to put on even more weight!

I battled the pain for nearly two months.  Some days it was better.  Other days, it was worse.  I struggled to even make it up and down the apartment steps.  Getting into my car was a challenge.  I couldn’t sit in one position for too long, or I’d start aching or be unable to stand up straight.

One day, the pain disappeared.  A few days after that,  I held a positive pregnancy test in my hand.  There was no way I was going to lose weight then!

The pregnancy was my roughest one yet!  I broke up with my fiance/baby’s father when I was only about three months along or so.  I battled through depression, thinking I had lost the baby, and my ex who turned psychotic in the meantime. 

Anyway, my baby boy was born nearly two weeks ago!  He was 9 lbs 6 oz and I named him Henry Owen.  I feel great!  I know that since I’m breastfeeding exclusively, I need to be careful as to what type of diet/exercise reigmen I go on, but I also know that I must do something!  It’s been a year since I’ve been able to diet/exercise!  With Spring on it’s way, I’m ready!

For the time being, I plan to simply watch what I eat.  I feel like I’m starving all of the time, and I wonder if it is from breastfeeding.  Regardless, when I go shopping this week, I’m going to stock my kitchen with healthy foods and snacks.  I hope to have lots of fresh fruit and veggies, some whole grains, and water galore!

As for exercise, I think I may just start walking.  Maybe go for an hour in the morning and an hour in the late afternoon.  I know I still need recovery time from having my baby and I don’t want to somehow trigger this herniated disc to act up again.  I don’t know if pregnancy is what made it go away or what, but I don’t want it back!

I’m hoping to find another weight-loss group on Buddy Slim to join, for I love having the support and competition!  I was a part of the Fat Assassins before, and they ROCKED!  I worked my butt off to try to win their weigh-loss competitions! 

I’ll update my weight ticker in a few minutes.  I had made it down to 150 lbs or so, I believe, but with all I’ve been through, I’m up to 196 lbs at the moment.  Eeek!  I do know that, realistically, some of that is still baby weight!  I’m still bleeding and losing fluid and it can take several months to lose it all!  I also know I MUST be carrying several pounds in my breasts at this point, lol, for even my biggest bra won’t fit me, lol. 

Any suggestions/support is appreciated!  Also, let me know if you know of any groups that would be good for me to join!

I know that most women must struggle with belly fat, especially since EVERY site I visit has little ads stating something like “Lose belly fat with one simple trick . . . “  But seriously, what can I do to lose this belly fat?

 I’ve had three kids, and I’m sure some of my belly “fat” is probably lose skin that will somewhat retract as I take this weight off.  But how do I get the weight off to begin with?  Is it a matter of simple diet/exercise, or are there specific measures to take?  Specific foods to avoid?  Specific exercises to do?

I do have to admit that I put on some of this belly fat before having kids.  Having kids made it grow bigger and bigger.  It is now my most unattractive feature.  It’s the thing I try to hide the most!

As soon as I put on weight, I put it on in my belly.  It doesn’t take much for me to not fit into my pants, or feel like I’m five months pregnant. 

I’ve noticed that it’s not only me.  I’ve been seeing more and more women, especially teenaged girls, with big bellies.  What’s going on here?  I never struggled with weight anywhere on my body as a teen.  Well, ok, I “thought” I was fat, but in retrospect, I was as fit as a fiddle!  What I’d give to have that perfect body now!

But that’s besides the point.  What can I do?   

Hey

I’ve been on and off of this site for the last few months.  Life has been rough . . . again.  

My father was severely ill, and I moved to take care of him.  I gave up my beautiful apartment in my beloved Pennsylvania to cram me and my little ones into a single room in Delaware.  But we were with Dad, and that’s all that mattered.  He was so excited to have us here!!!

Dad’s conditions worsened, and my children and I were practically living in the hospital over the past few weeks.  We were also living off of their food and the vending machines.  I can’t tell you how many cafe mochas and scones I’ve had, let alone Cokes to keep me awake, chips, chocolate, and greasy food.   

Let me tell you, all of the hard work I’ve put in over the past months seems like such a waste now.  I’m afraid to get on the scale, but my belly says it all.  I’ve put on lots of weight.  If only I were one of those people who couldn’t eat when I’m stressed out . . .

Anyway, Dad passed away last Friday.  :(  My ex refused to help me with the kids, and I wouldn’t leave Dad’s side, so the kids were with me when he passed.  Then, within a minute or so, My grandmother (my father’s mother) had a stroke.  She is now in the hospital.

My father was cremated yesterday.  I will be getting his ashes today.  He asked that I put some of his ashes on my mother’s grave.  They’ve been divorced for years, but he never stopped loving her.  So I will do that soon. 

I’m going to save some of his ashes and plant them, just like I did with my children’s placentas (even the placentas of the two babies I’ve lost.)  I actually have a pot full of dirt sitting in storage right now–dirt that I dug up from each of the sites where the placentas were burried.  I’ll add Dad’s ashes right to it, and plant a houseplant in there, so I don’t have to keep digging things up each time I move.  (Yes, I’m sentimental!)

Anyway, I’m not sure where I’m going to go from here.  The house I’m staying at (where my Dad was staying at) is my grandmother’s.  I need to be out of here before she comes back home, for having three children under the roof will be too much for her.  My ex boyfriend and I have been looking at apartments and townhouses.  Maybe something will come through.

I’ve been struggling to get back on this diet/exercise wagon.  I’ve been emotional, which is okay, considering the circumstances.  I’m also overwhelmed, for I’m the Executrix to Dad’s Will and his life was a mess.  I’ve been trying to put things in order, and get things out of his “house” before it falls apart.

So, I need all of the support I can get.  I learned long ago that if I can keep my diet/exercise in check, I seem to be able to control all aspects of my life.  So that’s where I’m starting. 

Hey y’all.  I’m feeling so very proud right now.  I weighed in.  I’m down to 158!!!  Yay me!  That’s a 6 pound loss over this one week!!! I have NOT been in the 150’s since I was a teen.  No matter what I did, I just couldn’t get below 160 lbs.  But I did it!

For the record, I’m sure this is actual weight loss and not muscle loss or water loss.  I’ve been eating three good meals per day and I’ve been keeping up with my water intake as well.  I also haven’t taken any water pills (I have in the past a few times) or anything else.  This is all from my hard work!

This is really the boost that I needed to keep going.  I never want to see that scale rise to 160 again.

Final day!  (I know, I know, five days is not really a whole week, but I always give myself the weekends off!)

Anyway, day five was also a success.  Good food.  Good exercise.  Skipped the afternoon jog due to HOURS of moving boxes. 

Went out at night to socialize/drink, and went for the gin in tonic since it would have less calories than a captain and coke.

I’m feeling very proud

Day four of my “Biggest Loser” challenge was also a success, but I almost crashed.

I did my morning jogging and ate well.

In the afternoon, I was moving van loads of my belongings to storage.  I was doing heavy lifting and lots of walking for about four hours.  I decided to allow that to replace my afternoon jog, for I was exhausted.

When I was done moving, I was suddenly STARVING!  I really  wanted to order out.  I was too tired to cook.  I didn’t have any easy to make food at hand.  

The battle began.

I looked through a menu.  Everything was fattening.  Everything had carbs.  And I’ll be damned if I’m going to order out a salad!  

I took a few minutes to sit back and think.  I thought of all of the hard work I did.  I thought of how disappointed I’d be in myself if I couldn’t make it through this one week of dieting.  I thought of my goal. 

Really, I wanted to cry.  The kids saw the menu.  They were begging me to order.  I was so, so close.  But I put the menu down.  Yay me!

I ended up making myself a quick salad and some macaroni and cheese for the kids. 

Then, despite how tired I was, I did my evening jogging. 

Now I’m sitting in my bed and feeling very proud tonight.  Tomorrow I weigh in!

Day three was also a success!  I’ve made it through “hump day.”  Yay me!

I jogged indoors today.  This morning, I jogged for five minutes longer than usual.  This afternoon, I doubled my jogging time.  This evening, I did my usual jogging, but it was right after a vigorous aerobic workout. 

I ate well today too.  Banana and blueberries for breakfast.  Chicken and potatoes for lunch, followed by an apple with peanut butter.  And leftover chicken and potatoes for dinner, with a big salad.  I also drank 16 oz. more water than my usual goal of 48 oz. 

I’m full of energy and I looked so, so good in my yoga pants today!  I can feel my body getting stronger and my muscles getting tighter. 

Two more days left of my one week challenge!

Day two was also a success!!! 

I did the same routine as yesterday, as far as the jogging/walking goes.  I jogged/walked three separate times, only once was at the park and the other two times were indoors.  My schedule just didn’t allow three quick park stops today. I did fit in yoga after dinner, which has left me feeling so, so relaxed.

I also ate extremely healthy–fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and water.  For some reason, I’m not feeling as hungry.  I wonder if maybe thats the effect of all of the exercise?  I’m defintely avoiding nighttime snacking! (I didn’t snack at all today, except for a banana.) I refuse to work this hard to throw it all away for a cupcake! 

While I’m jogging, I really, really hate it.  But I’ve found that music and thoughts motivate me.  I play songs on my mp3 player that remind me of “reasons” that I want to lose weight.  For example:

One song reminds me of photos from last summer when my ex bf and I were at the park together.  He had given me a piggy-back ride and the way my “muffin top” looked over my jeans was horrible!  So I play our song, think of that picture, and run!

Some songs remind me of my recent ex bf.  He is the jealous type, and the “hotter” I get, the more jealous he gets.  He’s a jerk, and he really put me down badly.  He called me names that I’ve never been called before in my life (it’s just his way of fighting.)  So when I hear songs that remind me of him, I want to run even harder to look as “hot” as I possibly can.

 I’m now realizing that I’m using guys and ex’s as my motivation . . . 

Some other songs remind me of this guy I have a huge crush on.  He’s in a band, and they are songs he sings/plays.  I’m always out dancing to his music (and yes, he likes me too, but it’s soooo complicated.)  Anyway, I think of me out there dancing right in front of him as he plays and the time we spend together afterwards and I want to look great for that too!

When the songs fail (things fail fast because I HATE jogging), I have other thoughts that motivate me.  I think of how much I hate my favorite jeans being tight on me.  I think about how I look like a “mom” when I know that I have the potential to lose this extra “mom” flab.  I think of how cute a flat tummy looks in snug-fitting summer tops.  Or how cute my tattoo looks when it peeks out from under my shirt (it’s on my lower back.) 

Anyway, I’ve only been going strong for 2 days, but what works, works.

Day one was a success!!!  I seriously had no time, between hours of driving, taking Dad to doctor’s visits, cooking, housework, and school. 

However, I stopped at the park at 8 this morning on the way to Dad’s and jogged for 15 minutes and walked for 30 minutes while the kids played.  I had packed a healthy lunch to reheat while at my Dad’s.  I again did the same park stop on the way home, and after picking up my daughter from school, I did the park stop again! 

In addition, I walked to pay my rent, to the post office, and to another park.  After dinner, which was healthy and wholesome,  I did my usual aerobics/toning routine!

I am so, so sore, but even more proud.  Yay me!  I burned 1,135 calories today, not to mention the 2000 I burn just by living.  With no time to snack, and healthy meals, my caloric intake was a little under 1000.

 I’m not sure if I’ll be able to do all of this tomorrow, but for the moment, I feel good.